AirPods create antisocial environment
April 24, 2019
As J. Jonah Jameson once said of Spider-Man, AirPods, Apple’s flashy audio accessory, are “a menace.”
Since the 2019 holiday season, AirPods have gone mainstream. Yet, the reasons for their popularity are incomprehensible to me. With many drawbacks to the devices, why is everybody buying them?
One of the problems with AirPods is that they foster antisocial behavior by isolating their users in their own small world of sound. Sure, regular earbuds arguably have this effect, but those with wires don’t try to hide it and wear a clear “Do Not Disturb” sign. AirPods, on the other hand, are often hidden by the user’s hair. Trying to grab the attention of the AirPoders without avail can seem like they brushed you off rudely since they have no physical indication of not being able to hear you.
Ray Bradbury, author of “Fahrenheit 451,” must be turning in his grave. He warned us of the potential for similar devices, dubbed “Seashells” in the story, to take over and ruin society through auditory isolation. But we didn’t listen.
Along with the social isolation, they also drive economic tensions within our school’s community. Banter between students with AirPods and those staying strong with their wires is incessant with some AirPoders dropping entitled statements such as “Sorry, I don’t speak broke,” and taunting those of us with wires calling them “chains of poverty.”
On the other side, wire bearers constantly inquire about the vast amounts of wealth AirPod owners must have. This is annoying for the wireless user who is trying to enjoy their music. Who knew earbuds could be so divisive?
So now that you know the social impacts of AirPods you must be wondering, “besides the social consequences, is the actual product worth the money?” Absolutely not.
Not only will you have no friends, but you’ll be broke too. The steep price comes in at $159.00 on Apple’s website. Even with all their features, that’s simply absurd. Measuring in at a measly inch and a half AirPods appear to be delicate, if an AirPoder drops one of them and someone steps on it, that’s a big investment thrown away. Apple’s already overpriced wired earbuds cost $29.00. For the price of Airpods, you could buy five pairs of regular Apple earbuds with enough cash left over to buy some avocado underwear from American Eagle. That’s money well spent.
A solution to the AirPod epidemic exists, however, in the form of a relatively inexpensive device that is connected to your phone when in use and is even powered by your phone instead of needing to charge! Normal, wired earbuds. What’s wrong with them? High-quality earbuds have the same, if not better audio quality than AirPods at a fraction of the price. Consider this next time the AirPods’ flashy advertising tempts you to throw your money away on such useless devices.
Camron Nodoushani • Apr 26, 2019 at 8:21 am
I’m sorry Connor, I don’t speak broke.