What’s the closest thing to real magic?
“Card tricks”

What’s the craziest thing one of your teachers has done?
“One time I had to watch a movie separate from the class. When I returned it I put it on top of her desk. Her desk was really messy and she emailed the entire faculty that I stole a slave DVD. Then every teacher told me I had to return it. It was in her desk the whole time.”

What’s the most interesting thing you have seen or read this week?
“There was a measles outbreak in Washington.”

What’s the best purchase you have made?
“My bed frame and mattress.”

What will finally break the internet?
“Probably ‘Bird Box’.”